This means creating a dedicated place for family and friends to connect and remember your loved one.
A Consistent Place of Healing
In our modern society, people aren't given enough time to grieve their losses. The pressures of work, even the simple emotional need to ‘be busy,’ often bring the bereaved back into the ‘real’ world far too soon. In Judasim, the shiva gives the family the opportunity to be comforted by the community.
Having such permanent place - in a cemetery- that can be visited regularly by family and friends is an essential part of the time following a death. It becomes a focal point of memorialization, and gives everyone a special place to go to remember your loved one, or to commemorate important occasions. It can help to make a birthday or anniversary less painful.
A permanent place to reflect on your loved one becomes a way of connecting to a family's past. Visiting the resting place of grandparents or great-grandparents may provide children with an anchor to their personal history. It is a connection to the past, to love shared. It truly honors the relationship you still have – and will always have – with that person.